Thursday, August 22, 2013

In Between


Blaine started middle school this year - those hellish few years in between elementary and high school. The years when you lose control of your body and mind. Your feet get too big for your legs and you trip over everything. Your face erupts with oil and pimples. Your sweat starts to stink. If you are a boy, you spend the next few years with your shirt untucked in case, well, you need to hide things that make you want to say OMG WHAT JUST HAPPENED STOP STOP GO AWAY.  And you spend so much time thinking about the growing feet, oily face, smelly pits, untucked shirts that you tend to  be confused and surly and just so damn emotional. And NOBODY understands.

Middle school is rough, no doubt.

But it's even rougher when you are the geek, the nerd, the picked on, the bullied. Blaine spent much of his elementary school years as the outcast. He doesn't quite fit. He genuinely likes school. Wants to be there. Loves talking to teachers. Strives to make good grades. He can talk politics, social change or video games. But most of his peers only like the video games. They don't want to listen to him talk at length about MLK Jr. and marriage equality and the documentaries he's watched and how he plans to change things when he's president. He's just different. And he's mostly ok with it - in fact he uses his experiences as a bullied kid to help others.  But, still, he realizes that his differences make him a target. And he has a hard time accepting that everyone doesn't want to be his friend.

So, my hope for this year? That he becomes an in-betweener.  The kid who falls through the cracks of the social hierarchy. That he be neither the bullied nor the bully. Instead, I hope that he will be that kid that everyone knows but doesn't pay that much attention to, positive or negative. I'm crossing my fingers that the kids who liked him in elementary school continue to like him. And I'm praying that the kids who picked on him and taunted him and pushed him around are so busy with their own changes and confusion that they ignore my son. Please. Middle school is hard enough. Please let him be an in-betweener in these in between years.

1 comment:

  1. I know how you feel. My oldest son was just like that. Things got easier for him because by about 8th grade most of the bullies had either dropped out or moved on to other bad habits and things began to change. Then when he reached high school he became very respected because all the kids knew he was the "go-to guy" for homework help and advice. Hang in there, Mom. Your Blaine is a very special guy. He's gonna be just fine!

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